So the novelty has finally worn off. I am missing New York. I said it would happen and it has. For the last couple of weeks my memory has been showing me views of the City. Nothing stupendous. Not what you see on movies, but things like standing at the far end of the 59th Street subway platform waiting for the 1 or 9. Or starting to run up the Cat Hill from the Loeb boathouse in Central Park. Or just the view down 9th as you cross the road to our old apartment building. Always filled with yellow cabs and red tail-lights. Course it doesn't help when I read Benjamin Wagner's accounts. He loves the place and it shows. And he lives in Hell's Kitchen too, so he talks of our neigbourhood. He's probably been to Route 66 since we left. Probably sat in one of the seats we sat in.

Yesterday I seriously wondered why we aren't still there, and not for the first time. New York in summer is almost unbearably hot, but it's beautiful and vibrant. I really miss it.

Don't get me wrong ... I am also happy to be back in the UK. This flat has more space for Jody, and I've been very much enjoying making friends at the toddler groups we frequent. Even the weather's been good (until this week) and Regent's Park and Marylebone High Street are wonderful places to have on your doorstep. But I don't feel for this city the way I felt for New York. It just sits there and is, whereas New York grabs you, shakes you around and throws you back down again. A very big part of me wonders why we ever left.

I am planning a big tour of London tomorrow morning though. A 16 mile tour to be exact. It's a route recommended by the Serpentine Running Club. Most of it is through the parks (Hyde, Green, St. James) and along the river to the Tower of London. It passes the Globe Theatre, the Tate Modern, the Aquarium, the Eye and all sorts of other London goodies. If I'm not too knackered, maybe this will make me fall in love with London? Maybe.

Sophie and Kate are coming over this afternoon with their sprogs. Jack is walking now, apparently, so I'll be able to see what sort of steps I'll have to make to babyproof this place when Jody starts.

I might coerce Roj to let me go shopping again this weekend. I wasn't overly successful last weekend and am still looking for outfits for two weddings. I'm still optimistic I'll find something - which tells you how long it's been since I've done the whole shopping experience. Might even get my hair cut as the guy in Shropshire didn't have any availability for next Wednesday. And then we'll start sanding. Yuk. Do you think we could get decorators in to do the sanding, and then paint ourselves? Anything wrong with wanting an easy life?!

Things are a bit better today. I'm finally getting on top of updates to the NYARA site, and my list of other things seems rather more achievable. Amazing what a good night's sleep and a napping baby can do for you!

I'm almost getting back on top of training too. Had a great run on Saturday which involved 12 reps of Primrose Hill (in a 1:50 run). I wanted to do a 2 hour run but I couldn't do the extra 2 reps required, and having just been off ill for the last 2.5 weeks, didn't want to push my luck. The bench of drunk teenagers provided ample entertainment for the duration and, I expect, vice versa.

Ran 5 reps yesterday morning and was definitely feeling the effect of the 12 from Saturday. However, seeing early morning sun blazing through summer mist and reflecting off the rooftops from the top of Primrose Hill (from which you get views of the London Eye, Battersea Power Station and much of central London), was very beautiful, and you can't complain when you only see a handful of people out. Solitude in the City is a rare and many-splendoured thing.

Will probably take Jody over to Paddington Green this afternoon to make the most of the last of the good weather and to attempt to wear her out before bedtime. May meet up with Kate and Sophie with their respective babies tomorrow, and then toddler group (the fab new one at St Mary's) on Friday. We don't have much planned for the bank holiday weekend yet, other than long runs all round (building to 3 hours on Saturday, with any luck), but next week am heading up to Shropshire midweek to complete that Long Mynd 16-miler that Roj did over Easter, and to get my split ends and teeth sorted while I'm at it.

Jody is still not attempting to walk, despite Roj's encouragement at the weekend. She likes to climb though, and this morning opened a door (we have handles, unfortunately) for the first time. And still no mummy and daddy, so I've issued her an ultimatum: no presents if she can't say 'mummy' by her 1st birthday! Which is only 6 weeks away already!

Right. I hear chirping downstairs. Daily interlude over.

Bleurgh. Jody is screaming. Jody has, in fact, been screaming most of the afternoon whether I pick her up or not. Nothing I can do will stop her screaming. It being Monday we went out to our usual toddler group at morning nap time. Previously she has managed to go down for a nap in the afternoon to compensate, but not today. I tried everything to no avail. She is just tired tired tired (and she's not the only one ...)

[Later] Phew. All in bed by 7pm as usual. A rather testing afternoon.

When we got to the toddler group this morning there was a notice on the door to say that it was cancelled. 35 minutes walk for nothing then. Luckily we bumped into nanny Kendra with JC on the way back, so she introduced us to the joys of one of the play areas in Regent's Park, with its fab sandpit and swings and stuff. Very much enjoyed making the most of the gorgeous weather.

I've got so much to do that has been building up the last few days. The list seems endless. And days like today don't help matters. Here's me having decided a couple of weeks ago to do the decoration of the flat myself, and have I done any of it yet? At this rate we'll be lucky to get it done in the next decade ...

Ugh. Jody was awake last night from midnight to 2am. Once again I resorted to watching late night telly with her to try and distract her to sleep (usually the last but most dependable resort). Some stupid match-making thing on C4 about a guy having to pick from three girls who came to live with him in his apartment for a few days. The only reason I watched it was that it was set in New York! At last Jody dozed off just before 2, but sadly that left only 3.5 hours until Roj's alarm clock went off (Roj has been working early and late all week), so I'm now back to being a zombie after a few days of respite. Hopefully Jody won't get into the habit of being such an insommniac.

Jody and I did our first mega Sainsbury's shop alone this afternoon. Couldn't face another attempt at tesco.com, however good it's supposed to be. Went very smoothly until the return trip when I kept hoping for red lights so I could feed Jody a belated snack before she screamed her head off, and then took some logistical planning to get 12+ bags through the front door, in the lift and into our flat while holding Jody and with only 40p for the pay and display (that's 8 minutes). I better not have forgotten anything!

Still struggling with my bad credit report. Turns out that my old mobile contract which I thought was cancelled wasn't and I never received the final demands for payment back in July 2002 since I didn't change the address (to NY) on my account (as I thought I'd cancelled it). I therefore owe O² (then BT Cellnet) £78. However, since they didn't hear from me they sold my debt onto a debt collection agency which tried in vain apparently, to contact Mrs Oblivious here. So I'm now trying to chase up the debt collection agency (with admirable help from fantastic customer service at O²), who can't find my debt because I don't have a reference number. They've searched under every possible reference point but nothing shows up. Which puts me in a spot because I can't pay thin air and nobody can send on a resolution to the credit reporting agency until the debt has been paid. On top of which the debt collection agency is incredibly rude and unhelpful and not even O² can help me sort it - despite a good couple of hours on the phone from my end. So it looks like some more pleading tomorrow or I'll have this completely unintentional black mark on my credit report which doesn't resolve for what? five years? Which means no credit cards, no mobile phone, and no anything else requiring good credit. Nor for Roj. Gah.

Goodness. Had my heart in my mouth as I read about Peta's recent episode with Aly and Toby. It's amazing how quickly things can go wrong even when you're as vigilant as you can possibly be. Thankfully it all ended up OK, albeit with tears.

Jody had her last jabs on Monday until the MMR, which'll be at 12-15 months. She didn't even murmur! She was in a very good mood yesterday too - grinning like a cheshire cat every time she looked at me. Still no sign of saying mummy or daddy, but she waved goodbye to Roj this morning, which was progress.

Went running this morning for the first time in 2.5 weeks. It was hard work but nice to be out again. Hopefully my cold won't deteriorate again because I really need the time to train now. Still waiting for my trail-runners (the pair I ordered were the wrong size), and now I have to send my heart rate monitor off to Polar for a new battery. Meanwhile the serial IR interface has given up the ghost too (or the port maybe), so I'm ordering a USB one. Can't be bothered to work out what's wrong.

Plumber came round yesterday to give us some bathroom quotes. Lovely man, but couldn't believe it when he said the floors alone would take 1.5 weeks each. I mean they're only about a foot square! Mind you he didn't seem the type to be pulling the wool, so I think we'll just have to go with what he says, especially considering the derth of alternative workmen available.

The page 23 thing suggested by Jon (better late than never): Set aside to cool slightly. Short but sweet.

Once again Roj takes a photo which is ten times better than any I've attempted. There's me - I take about 50 photos one afternoon, none of which are better than holiday snapshots. So Roj gets his hands on my camera, takes 5, one of which is a near-perfect shot of Jody and me (see 13th April Photo of the Day). Should be proud and impressed shouldn't I? Well I am, but also childishly jealous. I should definitely get over it. And maybe give my camera to Roj!

Had a good Easter holiday apart from my damn cold which, after showing signs of improvement, got worse again after the bike ride on Thursday so Roj did the long run alone. Next plan is to 'pop' up to Shropshire midweek in the next fortnight to do it myself. The lengths you go to when babysitters aren't close to hand.

The mtb ride at Coed y Brenin was fab. 22k of technical singletrack the likes of which I haven't ridden for quite a few years (Pyrenees, Dales, parts of the Peaks). My wrists are still hurting, and I am already looking at tyre reviews. Dry dusty tyres from America are going to be no good in this land of puddles.

Jody has finally recovered her cold (since giving it to my dad). She's much happier and more energetic now and therefore sleeping more (it makes sense to some of us!) Her sleeping through the night has been intermittent while she's been ill, but improving all the time now. Am looking forward to getting her back into the old London routine, starting with toddler group tomorrow morning.

She's learnt how to wave this past week though, and also intermittently how to descend steps and beds and sofas feet first, which makes me very proud. Not entirely sure whether she's recognising her mum and dad yet - she certainly says dada and mama a lot but it's too haphazard to be linked to any sort of recognition. That will be a great day.

Plans for the next few weeks? Well I've decided to take on the decoration of the flat myself, firstly to save us the nearly £3,000 quoted, and secondly to prise me away from this computer screen. Of course I might give up halfway through, but I'm keen to make a start. Do something constructive and basic and physical for a change.

And the running. Must do some running. Sven has just achieved a sub-1:30 half marathon (after billions of other consecutive running races), and is putting us to shame with his training. I am lagging far far behind and feeling (yet more) jealousy while watching the runners in this year's London Marathon. Sigh

Oh dear. Jody's in the wars tonight. She's suffering from a bloody mouth and a nasty viral rash on top of the lingering remnants of her cold. She's not particularly happy but right now, she's in the best place possible - bed. The rash came on this morning, just as we were thinking she was getting better. I noticed it first on her forehead but when we stripped her down we found it covered her whole torso. And with the rash came a marked increase in stroppiness and a loss of appetite. So after a pleasant day of walking on the Warren beach checking out Roj's boyhood holiday haunts (and hoping the rash would clear), we ventured down to the local stern Welsh doctor to have her poked and prodded and sent away with the viral diagnosis. Nothing we can do, apparently.

She ate reasonably well at dinner again - spaghetti hoops turning into a bit of a favourite - but she was whinging like crazy so I took her upstairs for a half hour of play before bedtime. One of her best tricks right now is to hold onto the rim of the bath and walk all the way around it, but the bath rim is at exact chin height (when bouncing) and has dealt her a couple of nasty blows, culminating tonight in a smack on the gums and the resultant bloody mouth. For a minute there I thought she'd have lost a tooth with the amount of blood that was coming out, and it was certainly difficult to see what was going on amidst the screaming and bleeding. But I nursed her and she finally stopped sobbing and drifted off, and I checked to see that the bleeding had stopped and then put her to bed. And felt terrible for her, because there's nothing worse than seeing my little girl in so much distress.

Abersoch is enjoyable, all things considered. I'd much rather Jody was her happy little self (and sleeping better, because obviously that's been the first thing to go), and I'm quite annoyed that my own cold/sore throat has such staying-power (so much for using this Easter for training), but it's not a bad place to recover. Nothing like a bit of sea air and some good old fish n chips to help things along.

Still wondering whether I'll be able to manage the ride on Thursday but won't make any decisions about that until tomorrow afternoon. Coed y Brenin is supposed to be up there with the best routes in Canada and Europe, so it seems a shame to miss out, despite the sniffling. Will probably just go along and hope it doesn’t make things worse. Roj has been training on his cold for a week now, and though I don’t subscribe to his methods of ‘recovery’, I think there has to be some middle ground.

Jody's screaming upstairs. Ever since she decided to abort her morning naps, we've been struggling to get her to sleep in the afternoon. She's as tired as anything but because she's not sitting in a moving car and because she's not being nursed, she refuses to go to sleep. Unfortunately we're going to have to initiate her into the routine of sleeping without all these aids sooner or later and now - while both of us are on hand to give it a go - seems to be as good a time as any. In fact Roj seems to be much better than I when Jody gets very desperate. Perhaps she just needs a change of face, or perhaps she objects to not being allowed the milk she can probably smell, but she just seems to relax quicker with Roj. Which is great for him.

My cold, after getting much worse over the last few days, is finally showing signs of improvement. Our scheduled 16-mile run has been postponed for a week, and we're hoping to mountain bike at Coed y Brenin on Thursday. Whether I'll be up to that yet remains to be seen as I still have a streaming nose and no energy, but with some good sleep and pub food, who knows!

Before that we have three more days relaxing in the Abersoch sun with very little to do. Not bad.

I'm ashamed of how little I've used my camera these last few weeks. It just seems that I always have something I ought to be doing instead, and lugging the thing around town on the offchance of a good shot is just unfeasible. I'm obviously going to have to rethink the whole photography section ... which falls into line with my ambitions to update and minimise the whole site. Eventually.

I think I can officially state that Jody is sleeping through the night. The last two weeks she's woken three nights - twice when she was starting her cold at the weekend and once the previous week. The acid test will be this next week when we take her away from her comfortable environment. I fully expect all to go to pot although Roj is being optimistic.

My search for trail-running shoes and a pack are proving very fruitless. I've found a nice little Macpac that I like, but don't really want to order one until I see it in the flesh. And there's a Lowe that would be a good alternative which I can't find listed in any shop anywhere. Mind you right now my inability to breathe through my nose might preclude the run on Saturday so not having the gear (to test) is hardly an issue. I just thought it might be fun to try!

I rarely mention telly, but in the last 24 hours I've watched two inspiring programs. Last night was our regular viewing of Grand Designs which this week featured a pre-fab American-style house for a young couple one of whom turned out to be someone I used to work with. It was quite amazing watching someone I know on TV, rather strange to see inside his house (I felt like an intruder, suddenly), but wow - what an amazing place! The construction was truly impressive but the inside they had really made their own with sumptious colours and textures and this bulbous organic fireplace which added warmth beyond the fire itself. Certainly made our little conventional London flat look rather tame.

The second program was a quick documentary just now about Alan Parker who won a NPG award for his documentary portraits of his colleagues and 'clients' in the Leicestershire Constabulary. How wonderful to watch a modern painter at work and one who, though Academy trained, is down-to-earth and interested in real life. He scorns traditional portraiture for its propensity to depict only those who are minted (in his own words) and instead uses his talents (and I suppose to some extent, exploits that tradition) to celebrate some of the most unfortunate and colourful characters he encounters. Lovely program - very understated (like him, I suppose) and inspirational.

Last night was much less painful than I imagined. Suzy the babysitter turned up at 7:05 - mother of 6, grandmother of 4, ceramics student. Jody went to sleep at 7:30. We went out at 7:50 and returned at 10:50. Jody slept throughout. Suzy was great - instantly reliable and friendly enough. She says that a lot of the people she babysits for rave about the agency ... which is reassuring. No problems encountered whatsoever. Which is exactly how it should be and I am relieved.

Jody and I are still suffering from these awful colds. Jody is unhindered by her streaming nose. I am fed up of breathing through my mouth and my nose is sore from blowing it. But I'm on the mend and still optimistic that I will be able to go running on Saturday, as is the plan (16 miles in big hills - yikes!)

Off to Covent Garden later to scour the outdoor shops for a good trail-running pack. My favourite Camelbak pack has a very inefficient waist strap and the only way I can run with it is by holding the shoulder straps taut at the front - which isn't conducive to good running technique. My adventure racing pack, though fantastic, is way too big for the Swaledale Marathon where the only gear you need to take is a cagoule, trousers, mug, compass etc. Any excuse to buy new kit.

Still struggling with the credit agency and finding a plumber, but the bathroom bill was sorted painlessly so at least we don't have to pay over the odds for flooring. Getting it done is another matter.

Off to Shropshire tomorrow evening until Sunday then on to Abersoch for most of the following week. Was imagining some fab windsurfing while we're out there but have shelved that idea due to the expectation that the temperatures won't get above about 12 degrees, and the water will still be unbearably cold from winter. 5mm wetsuits are all very well, but not when they don't cover your hands, feet and head. Hopefully we'll have ample opportunity to make up for it later in the year.

Gah. After 5 nights in 6 of Jody sleeping through, the last two nights have been hell. Particularly last night, when I must've slept a total of four hours in several small chunks. We put Jody to bed at 7:30pm and she kept waking every few minutes crying her little heart out. Turns out this morning that she's contracted Roj's nasty cold which was obviously the root of the issue so I'm feeling very sorry for her (in amongst feelings of utter exhaustion). Annoyingly the situation also put paid to any ideas I had of doing a long run this weekend as I could barely walk up the stairs let alone do reps of Primrose Hill. I'm now scarily getting quite badly behind on the training and, what's worse, am coming down with Roj's cold myself, so can probably wave goodbye to the next week or two's schedule. Which is perfect timing as it ruins plans for a serious week of long runs and mountainbiking over Easter in Shropshire and North Wales. Gah gah gah.

And of course I will have to duck out of the toddler group tomorrow morning for fear of infecting the whole of the under-2s population of London with Roj's lurgy (which he is recovering from nicely, I might add), and a late lunch with Kate and Jack and Sophie and Florence on Tuesday for the same reason - which makes my social life rather nonexistent this week, disregarding the planned dinner with Roj's dad, Jill and Tanya on Tuesday which might also have to be shelved (by me) and even if it isn't, will give me nightmares throughout as it marks the harrowing occasion of our first use of the babysitting agency. Can you tell how much I'm looking forward to this week yet?

As well as the cold/sleep issues, this weekend has been rather lame for other reasons. Firstly we spent too much of Saturday choosing plants (how we can spend 45 minutes finding two pot-plants and even then have to return one the next day, I will never know), and grocery shopping. We're also currently struggling with a mysterious lack of credit rating which is annoying as it means no mobile phones.

We did, however, manage to purchase several hundred pounds worth of bathroom fittings (some of which will have to be tweaked tomorrow morning, as we found to our chagrin that some items which we thought were just an estimate to complete the quote, are marked as 'un-cancellable' on our bill). That worrying fact aside, the purchase is weeks overdue so it feels good to have at least started the process. Lets ignore, for now, its impact to our bank balance and, more worryingly, to the budget which we'd set aside for renovating our flat which has now been completely blown out of the water.

I went to look round another nursery this morning. A bit big (75 children max), but a lovely vibrant atmosphere. I'm going to put Jody's name down even though priority is given to full-time kids, siblings and part-time 3-day-ers. The manager's best estimate for 2-day availability is August. Which is about what I expected.

I visited the closer cheaper nursery on Tuesday morning. Maybe it wasn't quite so vibrant, but it was a nice place and slightly more intimate with only 25 kids. It was also free to put Jody on the list so I did so and am not holding my breath since a slot might not come up for another 2 years. By which time we will be far away from the Big Smoke, I hope.

All this nursery viewing is a bit emotionally exhausting. However good they are, I can't help but wonder why on earth I would sign care of my child over to anonymous others in order that I might slave over a hot computer to produce not life-saving research material, but websites. The more I see Jody grow and develop the more I can't think of anything I'd rather be doing than helping Jody grow and develop. I originally wanted her to go into a nursery so that she'd have the social aspect of being with other kids, but frankly she can easily get that from the toddler and playgroups I go to in the week so that's no longer the big incentive. The big incentive is, instead, that I can work. Financially that's not viable because I'm unlikely to earn more than it costs to put her in the nursery in the first place, with my tenuous freelance work which comes and goes at best and even more when I can't commit a full 5-day week to it. So really it's all so I can reclaim a bit of non-mum-dom ... find my independence again ... boost my self esteem by bringing in some money ... discover what it is to deal with life without nappies, even for just two days a week.

But I love being a mum (more than anything), I feel more independent than ever before (not having to deal with other people's deadlines), my self esteem is fantastic because I'm doing the most worthwhile thing I've ever done ... and the dealing with nappies thing ... it's not so bad.

So clearly I have a bit of thinking to do. And in a way I'm quite pleased that I won't have to be making any long-term decisions before August so that I can take my time to weigh up the pros and cons. Or at least find some pros!

Meanwhile Jody has now slept through the night 4 times in the last 5 days, which is truly wonderful. She still invariably wakes a couple of times in the night, but just cries gently for a few seconds while she gets comfortable and then drifts back off. I'm still waking up when that happens but it's lovely to hear her being able to get herself back to sleep. I can't believe she's nearly ten months and only just starting to sleep through, but we only have ourselves to blame with all the disruption we've caused since leaving New York, and I'm just glad I didn't try anything traumatic like leaving her to 'cry it out' which might work for other mums but would probably have given me permanent nightmares.

Things are good. I'm still not running as much as I'd like, but am feeling good about my fitness when I do; I'm finally putting on a bit of weight (which helps when you're trying to build muscle!); and even the to-do list is shrinking. Still lots of people to catch up with but I think that'll be the case for several more weeks yet.

Easter is taking shape. Roj and I will be spending about 5 days up in Abersoch with Jody, and at either end we'll be dropping in on the grandparents while we attempt some long runs and mountain biking (also to see them, of course!)